A white haired long bearded man who's robes are made out of stars standing in a large whit

Gonvelous, My Average Day

Ruling over an entire realm is difficult, much like my son who rules the linear realm to the best of his ability—I have my own challenges. His time-bound people sometimes find being constrained to rigid schedules most difficult, and I completely understand. This is why I love my non-linear realm. Ah, so beautiful to have as much or as little time as needed for whatever must be done.

My daughter Viola came to her father and sweetly asked me to help people who've had their time stolen. She gave me a special gift to accomplish this because I do need assistance when interacting with TIMED people.

Timed people—those poor beings living from future moment A to future moment B. Do they ever wonder how they suddenly find they have exactly the time they need to accomplish something? These bonus moments are borrowed from... guess where? If you guessed the Non-Linear Realm, you'd be correct. Your bonus seconds come from our space—a little gift, as I do love all my grandchildren.

What, you think that because God created you, you don't have a grandfather? Nuts. Crazy. I am solidly your grandfather, and am I proud? Sometimes I am.

My happiest moments are with my wife, Dimensia. She and I share everything, but we had one thing that broke our hearts more than all others. Our son—you folks call him The Creator, God, what have you—had to be sent to his realm all by himself. It wasn't for any terrible reason, but because he simply cannot exist in the Non-Linear realm. He's too mentally fixed on the "time moves forward" concept. This was my greatest sadness.

But I swear, if these people he's created kill off my daughter Viola, I am stepping in. He might not be able to live in the Non-Linear realm, but I can live in his timestream just fine.

Right now I'm monitoring Morgana's latest heist. It's entertainment for me, but tracking all these activities is challenging when I have entire planets, peoples, and children to mind. Still, they are most precious.

a dancing sky of tulip petals mixed with tiny stars like a cosmic swirl of them and 3 red

A lady with red hair, long and curly, beautiful but crazed violet hued eyes, ripping apart

Now, my favorite of wives... well, no linear people would think I'm nuts, so I'm not telling you.

But it's certainly not Dimensia.

Ah, Dimensia—my first wife. A woman I created by borrowing some essence from my mother and her third star, throwing in my own, then adding a little wish magic. I blame her flawed creation on my complete lack of experience at the time.

Dimensia is two sticks away from blowing up the cosmos. You see, she IS Helena—or rather, she's Helena's star. The second star of the Non-Linear Realm. A chaotic lady who needs to visit a fruit farm and eat nuts until she becomes sane again.

But she won't eat nuts. We present her with daily deluges of them. Instead, the woman sits among the cosmic tulips, pulling apart petals and throwing them around the room—and at people trying to help care for her needs and issues.

On good days, she doesn't achieve much besides chaos. On bad days, she's killing folks for whatever reason strikes her fancy.

If I ever invade the linear realm, I'm leaving Dimensia behind. It's embarrassing as hell that I can't put her back together. Generally, I'm much better at fixing insane citizens. But that wife of mine has no taste in men. Honestly, if she'd just think for once, she might pick someone decent. No—she goes with "he's so handsome" or "so powerful" or "one of Aria's great romances." At least that last option gives her a few decent men.

Yes, she's forever been a cheater, but you don't divorce a wife when you're a cosmic leader—not for infidelity anyway. It's not like I have room to complain. I've had more than a few affairs myself. When you live for zillions of years, being faithful to just one soul seems impossible. Or at least it is for Dimensia and me. We like variety.

Watching the linear realm is much nicer than dinner with my wife.

A beautiful long, red, curly haired woma

red roses and rose petals dancing around a nebula standing over a beautiful white castle w

3 pictures in a white castle room 1 pict

Now everyone wants fatherly advice. I've had an uncountable zillion or so kids, so I feel like an extreme expert on the subject.

My first bit of advice: every kid is different. No matter how much of a copy you create from a soul, you end up with someone entirely unique.

Ah, soul copies—one of my favorite techniques when you have a really good soul. I taught my son the method during one of his visits. But you must be careful with the copier. Ever double-expose a page? Yeah, it's nasty if you go too fast. The copier also degrades over time, and they're so expensive that sometimes we overuse them.

My favorite son went and forgot this principle. But that's the problem with cosmic-grade amnesia—you forget your basics.

Second piece of wisdom: none of them come with an instruction manual. Angel girls get a small tea book, but honestly, it's still not a guide on how to care for them. You're going to make mistakes because what worked for kid number one won't work for number two—or your zillionth—exactly the same way every time. Give yourself permission to screw up. It makes the journey more exciting anyway. Why else have a few zillion kids?

Final piece of advice—this is my mother's rule: Love your kids well and have them learn from love. Love your spouse well and learn from love. Always love everyone else well, then live well on love.